Everyone needs help at some point
Every once in a while, we all find ourselves in need of a bit of help. No matter who we are and what level of society we are from, we all need the support of our family and friends. We should not feel shame for asking for help because everyone needs assistance at some point in our lives.
It’s all our fault
As an artist, you constantly get lectured about career choices. If there is a financial struggle of any kind, then obviously, the artist needs to get a real job. We then get the long lecture about making better choices and that art is something you do only after retirement.
Wolves at the door
The unnecessary lectures are why artists wait until the wolves are at the door to ask for any assistance. We try and avoid the pain of requesting help as long as possible, hoping for a positive outcome so we may avoid having to ask. Gloria Steinem is right. The pain of being misunderstood by people we respect and care deeply about is unbearable.
The mirage of support
One would think that families would support their creative offspring unconditionally because we have all witnessed misty-eyed parents admiring their prodigy’s creative expression at concerts, exhibitions and dance recitals. This outpouring of support may be genuine when the children live at home and are early on in their education. The level of support changes when the parent decides that the young artist has had enough “fun” and needs a good dose of reality.
Help with strings attached
Offered assistance comes with strings attached, and these conditions are usually more like chains than strings. In the case of financial help, more likely than not, the artist is required to give up on their art and meet the repayment terms. If not, they get cut off.
Photo by A. Grenier
You’re on your own
Claude Monet got cut off financially when he chose Camille-Léonie Doncieux as a partner and wife. His family determined that she just wasn’t good enough for him and cut off his allowance. Even when Camille lay dying a painful death a few years later, and Claude couldn’t afford the painkillers needed to relieve Camille from her suffering, his family still refused to help him out in any way. Leave her, and the money will flow again, his father told him when he asked. Faced with the choice of leaving his dying wife for cash he chose to stay by her side.
It’s your choice, so live with it
Amedeo Modigliani’s common-law wife, Jeanne Hébuterne, lost the support of her family when she decided to live with him. Even the birth of their first grandchild didn’t seem to soften their heart. They believed that by not helping her and their grandchild, they weren’t helping him. After all, Modigliani was an alcoholic living in extreme poverty, and some would probably agree that her parents were right. Even when she became pregnant with their second child it didn’t change the relationship she had with her family. But what happens after you’re right?
Taken from and Identification Photograph
Tragic results
Modigliani died of tuberculosis and neglect before the birth of his second child at the age of 35, and it was only upon his death did they accept their pregnant daughter back with certain conditions, of course. Her father put so much pressure on her that at 9 months pregnant, she threw herself off the roof of her family home in despair, not only killing herself by also her unborn child.
The same stories
Stories like these are commonplace throughout the history of art. Society now admires the actors, musicians, artists, dancers, poets and writers, who all have seemed to suffer similar fates.
Unrequested advice
At fifty-seven years old, I still get scolded like a child and told that I should give up on my art. You’ve given it a go, they say. Forget about it. Do it on nights and weekends. Paint when you retire. I’ve heard them all.
Yet they know nothing about me
Completely overlooked is the fact that I own my own cultural business and have an excellent international reputation as an artist. Over the past forty years, I have taught in reputable art centres and have taken other jobs to keep my family fed and with a roof over our heads. I’ve worked three jobs to make ends meet.
The high price of making art
Like every other artist, present or past, it would appear that my insistence to keep standing at my easel comes at a very high price. Artists tend to lose everything because people can’t seem to get past the nature of their job.
My own life
As an artist and a student of art history, I am not surprised by my fate. I know with absolute certainty that if I stay the course, get the work done, I will continue to reach even higher levels of success. I see no reason why not to pursue a career that I love. Life, after all, is way too short not to be happy at our “job.”
Quote of the day
“Being misunderstood by people whose opinions you value is absolutely the most painful.”
~ Gloria Steinem ~
