Half-empty pants?

I inherited my funny bone from my Grandma Fran.  She saw humor in everything and laughed for well over a hundred years.  I am told that it wasn’t always the case with her and at some point she made the conscious decision to live a life of joy.  I don’t remember her being any other way so it was way before I came into the picture. She had a nice long life filled with laughter.  That’s what I want.

What I learned from both my Grandmothers is that we do get to choose how we live our life.

Examples of what we don’t want abound.

Half-full or half-empty. Laughter or sadness.  Being a nice person or being a dick.

A dick is a dick.

But are they really?

According to a recent informal survey of mine, not all dicks are the same and surprisingly some just don’t measure up.

I have heard it on good authority that size does matter whether you measure it in inches or if you unfortunately have to measure it in centimeters.

Another bubble buster: it’s not what you do with it either because if she ain’t feeling it inside her to begin with then what you do with it is irrelevant.

Apparently it’s yet another thing small men like to tell themselves so they don’t have to make any effort to evolve.

Small dicks make for the biggest dicks and that’s why they end up living alone.

I’m not alone.

In this case the really nice guy got the whole enchilada and the taco too.

The ladies know that the really nice guys always “finish” last…